Attach as many microphones, pickups, phonographic cartridges, and contact mics to your instrument as possible. Feed these transducers in turn to as many different amplifiers and speaker systems as possible.
Using screwdrivers, chisels, chainsaws and whatever other tools you might need, disassemble your instrument, deconstruct it into as many different component parts as possible.
Perform a brief cadenza on each distinct part.
To the best of your ability, re-assemble and reconstruct your instrument.
Perform a brief cadenza on the reconstructed instrument.
Switch off the power.
[Please contact me in the event of any public performance of this piece]
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